[This had been easy once, hadn't it? Didn't Thor know once that he could embrace Loki at a whim, that Loki's palpable frustration with it or his endless grousing would be betrayed by the warm beacon of fondness shining through in his eyes? Wasn't there a time where they were each other's greatest confidants, trading secrets under the safe blanket of nightfall when the rest of the palace had long since settled to sleep, secure in the knowledge that a bond such as their was near unbreakable?
Sometimes it's hard for Thor to wrap his mind around how far from that they've found themselves. As much as part of Thor had been waiting for Loki to reestablish the distance he's demanded more and more of inside of the last few years it still stings to have his hand shrugged away as if Loki couldn't free himself from Thor's touch quickly enough, and he swallows hard against the fresh wave of guilt Loki's words leave washing up the back of his throat like bile as he turns away towards the bowl. The coin feels no less heavy in his hands for having Loki back with him, not when it still represents so much loss he's responsible for. He worries it with his thumb, his thumb rubbing idle circles into the metal as he thinks of Heimdall, of all the Asgardian blood spilt because he couldn't protect their people like they deserved, of the countless lives lost across the universe because of the choices he's made, and Thor's heart has never been heavier than when he releases the coin to join the others already given in a desperate bid for their safe passage to whatever the afterlife may hold for them. He opens his mouth to pray, the words right on his tongue--
Until Loki's question trips him up. Thor looks to him, his brow creased heavily in confusion, and all at once Loki's words from earlier filter back into the forefront of his mind. Although leaving Asgard to that miserable witch was a bold move for the mighty Thor.
He didn't know it was possible, but his heart sinks even further.]
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Sometimes it's hard for Thor to wrap his mind around how far from that they've found themselves. As much as part of Thor had been waiting for Loki to reestablish the distance he's demanded more and more of inside of the last few years it still stings to have his hand shrugged away as if Loki couldn't free himself from Thor's touch quickly enough, and he swallows hard against the fresh wave of guilt Loki's words leave washing up the back of his throat like bile as he turns away towards the bowl. The coin feels no less heavy in his hands for having Loki back with him, not when it still represents so much loss he's responsible for. He worries it with his thumb, his thumb rubbing idle circles into the metal as he thinks of Heimdall, of all the Asgardian blood spilt because he couldn't protect their people like they deserved, of the countless lives lost across the universe because of the choices he's made, and Thor's heart has never been heavier than when he releases the coin to join the others already given in a desperate bid for their safe passage to whatever the afterlife may hold for them. He opens his mouth to pray, the words right on his tongue--
Until Loki's question trips him up. Thor looks to him, his brow creased heavily in confusion, and all at once Loki's words from earlier filter back into the forefront of his mind. Although leaving Asgard to that miserable witch was a bold move for the mighty Thor.
He didn't know it was possible, but his heart sinks even further.]
What happened before you were brought here?